So while I’m sat at home, signed off of work with laryngitis, watching back to back episodes of all my online programmes and chowing on twenty pounds worth of Sushi, I ponder over a text message I received at 10.45am this morning..
“Hey babe, we haven’t spoken in a while. How’s it hanging?”
I look at this message from Nathan and laugh. Firstly, I have just woken up and he is asking me how it’s hanging. More like I should be asking him how HE is hanging (long and gorgeous from what I remember.) Second, why is he saying we haven’t spoken in a while? The last thing Nathan and I do is speak. You see, Nathan and I have always had one of those relationships where speaking was the last thing we needed (unless it is a text to make arrangements.)
I would be fast asleep on a Friday night and I would get a text message at 5am saying “where you at?” Now we all know what one of those messages means. BOOTY CALL! Unfortunately for him, I would be sleeping, lucky for his right hand however.
Saturday night would come and I would be out partying with the girls. Few drinks down me and BAM I am as confident as a coconut falling from the tree to make love to the sand. Phone out, get my text on.. “Nathan, I am drunk, where are you?” A reply instantly would be “coming to pick you up from wherever you are babe!” or “in town partying, lets meet halfway?!” or something of the sort, but whatever the case, he would always want to see me.
Next thing you know, he has picked me up in his BMW or I am meeting him via a cab (or a tuk tuk) halfway. We would either end up back at his, in a hotel room or staying in his car to have a bit of a drunken session.
Some of you may be thinking, why would I go meet him when all he is after was a late night rendezvous?! Reason being, was because that is all I ever wanted from Nathan too. So to be getting a text message from him at before midday baffles me.
I simply reply (a few hours later) saying, “Hey hun I am well thanks, how’s all with you?”
Within two minutes he responds with, “Yeah I am good thanks. Do you wanna meet up for a coffee at some point?”
Hold on a second, I haven’t spoken/seen Nathan for maybe a year or even longer, simply because our last encounter went horribly wrong and I have been too embarrassed to speak to him (basically I noshed him off whilst wearing red lipstick and being horribly drunk and I thought I had cut his penis and screamed to him that it was bleeding. No it wasn’t. It was my lipstick. You can imagine the horror!) So now he is asking me out. Hold on, is he asking me out? Is that like a date? The texts I am used to from Nathan were things like, “there is a party in my pants, do you want to join?” or “I miss your cupcake!” (cupcake is code for vagina, yes, he used to call my vagina a cupcake!) Not do you want to meet for coffee!!
Twenty minutes pass and I reply saying, “Coffee? Since when do me and you meet for coffee? Do you mean coffee and ‘cupcake’ or just coffee?”
He replies, “Wow I have missed your sense of humour. No cupcake, just yet. Just coffee and to see you, I guess I have missed you. Are you free Saturday?”
Oi vey! Has it come to this? Does he really miss me and want to see me and not just eat cupcake? Well, I most certainly cannot see him Saturday. It is Thursday already and EVERY girl knows the rule. If a guy wants to see you on the weekend and it is after Wednesday, you have to prolong it.
I reply, “Really busy this weekend, one eve next week work?”
He replies “sure babe, will call you on the weekend, look forward to seeing you.”
I have no idea as to why he all of a sudden, over a year later has come back with interest, but I will keep you all updated!
Little Miss V..xx